Losing You
by kitsuneshadow47
Summary: Merlin's been placed under the evil influence of the Fomorroh by Morgana. Compelled with the intent to kill his own king, Merlin struggles to refrain from hurting Arthur. Merthur oneshot based off future events from 4x06: "A Servant of Two Masters."


**Losing You**

**Characters~ **Arthur & Merlin

**Warnings~ **Slight OOC, _some _4x06 "A Servant of Two Masters" spoilers, a couple parallels to the original Arthurian legend, and...well, reality vs. imagination (that's all I can give you at this point beforehand)

**Disclaimer~ **I don't own Merlin—Arthur does. XD

**Notes from the KIT-chan~**

What my mind pretty much conjured up based off of future events that may occur in 4x06 in about an hour this fine Saturday... ^^"; But obviously, half of this won't really happen in canon. =w=";

Enjoy anyway~ XD

.::.*~Kit Shadow~*.::.

~o~

_Ka-thump._

_Ka-thump._

_Ka-thump._

_Ka-thump._

"MERLIN!"

_Thump._

In that instant, the raven's heart was pounding furiously in his chest. He was running as fast as he could, struggling not to look back at the blonde knight that was still chasing after him relentlessly.

"Merlin!"

Merlin only swallowed hard, squeezing his eyes shut even tighter, and kept sprinting headlong, past the numerous trees that surrounded them. At that point, the effects of Morgana's magic had continued to grow stronger, and he was fighting desperately to keep his mind, as it was now no more than torn between protecting the one person running after him and turning around to strike him down right where he stood.

The sound of Arthur's calls ringing through his ears were making things so much worse, and the raven knew that himself as he tried insistently to push his voice far back into the few remnants that were still left of his sanity.

"_Merlin!"_

The raven inhaled sharply, a knot beginning to form in the middle of his throat.

Soon enough, a familiar cave had come into view in his path, and without hesitation, he'd sprinted straight into the cold darkness.

~o~

What Merlin wasn't expecting, however, was how Arthur had followed him inside without a single moment's hesitation, and in a split second, the blonde was a mere few feet away from him as he found himself curled up and trembling in one of the farthest corners of the cavern, his face anguished and damp forehead pressed against his knees.

"Merlin," Arthur had spoken in a quiet, hushed tone.

The raven gulped, a ragged exhale escaping from tight lips. But he still refused to look up and meet the Pendragon's gaze, for there were absolutely no words that could describe just how much pain he was in at that point. He could feel the Fomorroh's influence fighting inside him, mercilessly constricting his will deep from within the corners of his thoughts and compelling him to kill his own king that very instant.

From that, it was more than evident that Morgana was nearby, watching him suffer as Arthur reached over to place a calming hand over his tense shoulder.

Immediately, Merlin had flinched back, shrinking away from the blonde's touch and burying his face into his palms.

"_Don__'__t_," he murmured quietly, his voice hoarse and agonised. He took a deep breath, curling back more against the cave walls. "Please…just stay away from me."

From a moment's glance, he could see the blonde stiffen, his countenance rigid and eyes as pained almost as much as his was.

"Merlin, I—"

In that instant, the raven swallowed hard, carefully turning his head to meet the other's gaze, and frowned.

"_I __don__'__t __want __to __hurt __you_," the words came out in a choked whisper. "I don't want to hurt you, Arthur. I'll never forgive myself…"

At this, the young king winced, standing almost helplessly before his friend, then sat down beside him, letting out a long sigh.

"I'll never forgive myself if something bad ever happened to you," he'd replied in a hoarse, anguished tone.

At that moment, Merlin's breath stilled, and he'd turned to look into sapphire blue irises. "Arthur—"

Suddenly, he'd felt a sharp twinge far into the very back of his mind, and it took everything the raven had not to lift a finger to harm the blonde that instant. Merlin squeezed his eyes shut again, letting out a cry of agony before completely turning away from Arthur to face the dark cavern wall.

"Leave me," he'd whispered, barely audible but just enough for the young king to hear at that point.

But Arthur only frowned, slowly shaking his head in response to the raven's desperate request. "No. Merlin—I won't leave you here to suffer on your own like this. What kind of friend would I be to do that to you?"

Merlin exhaled sharply, pausing for a long minute. "But I'm a monster—look at me. You even said so yourself just how magic was pure evil," he'd murmured back, tears beginning to well up under his eyes. "My powers have already fallen into the wrong hands. If I wasn't fighting it, I could kill you right now—I _can_kill you right now, like how magic ended up killing both of your parents."

The blonde's breath stilled, and for a moment, it was deathly silent. "I know," he answered in a firm, slightly icy tone.

At this, the raven had shivered, wrapping his arms around himself even tighter. "Then—" he'd begun to croak.

Before he could say anything more, Arthur resolutely shook his head again, bright eyes steadfast and intent on him. "But regardless, I _still_ refuse toabandon you," he spoke in a firm tone. "I won't leave you, Merlin. Not after all we've been through."

At that point, hot tears had begun to roll down Merlin's pale cheeks. "Arthur—"

_RUMBLE._

All of a sudden, the ground had started to shake, and immediately, the two had whirled around to see large boulders starting to fall in, sealing off the entrance to leave them to what they both knew would be their doom.

Without a doubt, this had all plainly been Morgana's doing—a plot to lure the both of them into one spot just so she could kill two birds with one stone, or better yet, more like with an _avalanche__of__boulders_, if you will.

The walls were already caving in on them, and the two looked around frantically as they searched for a way to get themselves out of there that instant.

But then Merlin's eyes instinctively fell on the young king, and with that he'd used the rest of his remaining strength to push Arthur out of the cave to safety using all but a simple wave of his palm, eyes flashing bright gold for only a brief second.

Before long, the blonde had stood up on his feet, and the raven had watched desolately as he'd started to come and run back for him immediately, the falling rocks separating them to a far distance but close enough to barely see one another's face.

Arthur's expression was stricken and anxious as he peered through the avalanche to catch wounded eyes staring back at him in the cold darkness.

"MERLIN!" he'd screamed at the top of his lungs, watching in horror as his friend began to completely disappear behind the landslide of colossal boulders.

In response, the raven had all but winced, mouthing out words only intelligible to the blonde himself that very moment right before the entrance had finally been sealed shut—and Arthur's heart had almost stopped as he understood just what the latter had wanted to say as a final, parting message.

_I love you._

Soon enough, all had grown silent and still once more, and the young king stood with a hurt expression on his face, eyes wide with anguish as he stared down at the ground beneath him.

"Merlin..."

_Crack._

Unfortunately, Morgana's vindictive plans were far from over at that point, for immediately Arthur had whirled around to meet two big yellow eyes and a set of terribly sharp teeth.

"_Gryaah!"_

~o~

From even within the deepest, darkest parts of all that remained of the small cavern, the voice of the creature's cries echoed loud enough for Merlin to hear, leaving him to cringe as he pictured Arthur fending for himself alone just past the numerous rocks.

But the minute he'd tried to get up on his feet, the Fomorroh's control on him instantly forced him back down on the ground, making him writhe in excruciating pain.

"Arthur..."

Suddenly, a faint blue light had illuminated the shadows.

~o~

At that moment, Merlin could feel his strength slowly coming back to him, and soon he was able to stand up tentatively to follow after the curious luminosity, only to hear soft but familiar voices repeatedly murmuring his name over and over again as he grew closer to the mysterious source.

"_Emrys..."_

By the time he reached the end of the light, the voices had fallen silent, and the raven could see the Druids waiting for him at the other end of the cavern with calm but vigilant expressions on their faces, the Druid Chieftain present among them as well.

"Emrys," Iseldir had spoken, taking a small step forward to acknowledge the latter's presence that instant.

And likewise, Merlin had nodded once to him, impassiveness shrouding over pure apprehension. But seconds later, that mask had gradually faded off, as soon as his eyes had found the very source of the blue radiance emanating before him: a glass, rectangular box set by itself in the middle of the cavern, filled with what seemed to be like water from the Gates of Avalon...and big enough for just one person to fit in.

Immediately, the raven's eyes had widened, and his breath had stilled as watched bright cerulean waves ripple from within the shining glass.

He'd remembered vividly as a child when he'd seen countless visions of this same chamber and of himself lying motionlessly inside that very box...and only now had he finally come face-to-face with the real thing, a chill running down his spine upon realising that it had all been his future that he'd been seeing that whole time during his childhood.

And with that, Merlin had felt a slight twinge of pain deep down in the pit of his stomach, as he knew exactly what was to become of him next...for it was his destined fate—the ultimate sacrifice to finally triumph over Morgana's wrath, save Arthur from his impending doom, and secure the very unification of Albion itself.

"It is time," Iseldir had spoken in a hushed, solemn voice, and the raven had raised his head to meet the Druid Chieftain's gaze.

With that, Merlin had slowly closed his eyes, letting out a long sigh. "Is there really no other way for me to save him?" he'd asked in a soft murmur.

But almost instantaneously, he'd felt the Fomorroh's power jolt down his back, and Merlin inhaled sharply, forced to stare painfully into Iseldir's sombre eyes.

"I'm afraid not, Emrys," the latter had replied in a sad tone, wincing as he glanced down at the glass box and frowned. "The Fomorroh must be destroyed, otherwise Albion shall be doomed."

At this, the raven swallowed hard before glancing around at the anxious faces across from him on the other side of the room and began to picture the faces of not just Arthur himself, but Gwen, Gwaine, Gaius, and everyone else back in Camelot that he'd always held so close to his heart even now to the very end. After a moment of dead silence, Merlin had taken a deep breath and looked into Iseldir's eyes with a steadfast gaze, nodding once in definitive consent.

~o~

It hadn't been long until finally, Excalibur had revealed its true power in King Arthur's hand, a strong blue light illuminating the sword to its very hilt as it drove him to deal the final blow on the monster's great neck and strike it down to complete absolute triumph.

Soon after, the blonde was breathing heavily beside the fallen creature's carcass, his face covered in grime and expression entirely exhausted. But still that hadn't stopped him from rushing back towards the cave, eventually finding a hidden crevice beyond the bushes large enough a knight to fit through.

~o~

"Merlin?"

At first, all Arthur had seen was darkness and debris left from the landslide before, but after a while, he'd finally come across the same mysterious blue luminosity that he'd realised, not long after that, had been quite oddly similar to the one from his sword, and instantly, he'd reached out to follow it to the very end.

Though ultimately, he'd stopped dead in his tracks the moment he'd come within a mere few feet of the unusual glass box, a strongly recognisable figure lying immobile just beneath clear cerulean.

At this, the Pendragon's face had immediately grown rigid, and it had taken him a great deal before finally bringing himself to approach the shining glass.

In an instant, he'd abruptly held his breath the minute the raven's pale face became visible under the surface of azure waves.

His expression was almost angelic at that point, no longer tormented by the malicious grasp of the terrible Fomorroh, the bright blue light elucidating each and every distinct feature Arthur had been familiar with for so long that it hurt the young king terribly to see his best friend motionless before him, never to wake up from a never-ending sleep.

And soon, he'd come to realise the truth behind all that had just recently occurred, and it hit him hard through the very core of his heart, as he watched the latter finally at peace before him.

Arthur swallowed hard, letting out a ragged exhale, as he limply reached over to press his hand firmly against cold glass, tears beginning to well up under hurt, sapphire blue eyes.

"...Merlin?" the name came out in a hushed, anguished whisper.

But the latter didn't stir.

~o~

.

.

"Merlin?"

.

.

"Merlin!"

There was a shuffle, then a low cry that instant.

"Arthur—Arthur, wake up!"

At that moment, the little blonde had woken up to find himself being shaken vigorously, finding pale hands firmly holding both of his shoulders before he'd finally looked up to meet concerned blue irises.

Shortly, Arthur had let out a sharp exhale as he watched the other boy tentatively let go of him, his expression anxious and concerned. "It's okay. You were dreaming," he'd heard him say in a tired, reassuring tone.

With this, the young prince had sat up in his bed, relieved to see his raven-haired best friend lying down beside him. He looked at Merlin for a long moment, then lowered his gaze down towards the burgundy covers draped over his legs, his countenance dismal and solemn.

In an instant, the small raven had shifted closer to him, watching him carefully before speaking in a fretful tone. "Arthur—are you all right? You look pale. Do you want me to get my mum?"

The blonde closed his eyes and sighed, slowly shaking his head in response. "I'm fine."

At that, Merlin took a deep breath, gazing timidly at his best friend before speaking in a softer voice. "...was it your dad again?"

Arthur slowly shook his head. "No, Merlin."

There was a brief pause, then another inquiry. "Your mum?"

The Pendragon shook his head again in response, this time more solemnly. "Not this time."

In that instant, Merlin paused once more, then finally gave up with guessing, leaning back against the warm pillow under his head.

"Then who?" he'd asked, his voice just above a hushed whisper.

Another moment of silence. "Well...you. I lost...you."

"...oh."

After that, the blonde let out a long sigh, glancing over to see a solemn expression fade onto the latter's pale face, and frowned, wincing.

"...Merlin?"

"Yeah, Arthur?"

The young prince hesitated slightly, searching for the right words to say to the other that instant.

"...we're best friends, right?"

In response, the raven frowned, turning to meet Arthur's gaze before nodding once. "Yeah..."

Soon, there was yet another pause between the two boys. Then Arthur swallowed hard, shifting even closer to Merlin just as he spoke in a hushed, slightly apprehensive voice.

"Well, then...can I ask you to promise me something?"

The latter nodded again. "Sure."

The Pendragon took a deep breath, exhaling sharply as he raked a hand through soft, dishevelled blonde hair, then pursed his lips. "Merlin...can you promise me that no matter what happens, you'll never leave my side even for an instant?"

The room became very quiet.

At that moment, Arthur held his breath as he waited tentatively for the raven's response. But soon enough, he'd found warm arms wrapped around his torso and peered down to find his best friend leaning his head against his chest. "Of course," the reply came in a soft, hushed whisper. "Of course I promise, Arthur."

The blonde closed his eyes, then exhaled slowly and returned the other's comforting embrace, holding Merlin as close as he could have possibly managed.

And with that, the raven let out a small laugh, smiling against the young prince's chest for an instant. "Even if there'll be times where you'll really don't want me to...you know I'll always be here for you."

_~Cause __there'll __be __no __sunlight__  
><em>_If __I __lose __you, __baby__  
><em>_And __there'll __be __no __clear __skies__  
><em>_If __I __lose __you, __baby__  
><em>_And __just __like __the __clouds__  
><em>_My __eyes __will __do __the __same __if __you __walk __away__  
><em>_Everyday, __it'll __rain, __rain, __rain__…_

~o~

**Music ****on ****My ****Mind~**It Will Rain by Bruno Mars (don't own)

**Notes from the KIT-chan~**

_Review?_

If any of you were wondering, the water coffin bit's based off of what happened to Merlin in the the actual Arthurian legend (where I think this woman named Niviane lured him to his death or something like that...really hope that part doesn't happen in the BBC series, though-I would be more than devastated to have my babies separated like that o.o)

Anyways. still waiting for THE EMBRACE EPISODE to air on the livestream... ^_^";

Hope you enjoyed the short read~ :D

.::.*~Kit Shadow~*.::.


End file.
